However, his mother represents what I believe to be for many black children, the pressure to have to be excellent and to work twice as hard. His mother was a professor who always encouraged him to read and so from a very young age, he was able to gain these skills that helped to advance him academically. For most of his life, it was just his mother and him, although his grandma did play a very important role. From the very beginning though, he makes it known that the relationship he had with his mother was very intimate in ways that were comforting at times but also quite distinctly unhealthy. Laymon is essentially writing this book to his mom as a tell-all account of all that he has been through throughout his life. That feeling did subside a bit as the book continued but it was still uncomfortable to read especially in the beginning. I feel like I’m opening the curtains to the lives of individuals I have not earned the right to.” There was this clear feeling of intrusion. When I first starting reading it I felt as though I was in the midst of a deeply personal conversation and I wrote in my notes, “I’m tearing up. The authenticity he showed in that interview was also very prominent in this book and was the vehicle that carried some of the key themes of black masculinity, gendered and raced violence, sexuality, eating disorders, and abuse. My favorite interview though, was the one he did with a YouTuber named Joulezy because I think she was able to connect with him in a very genuine way. So before reading Heavy, the memoir by Kiese Laymon, I had watched a few interviews with him describing the book and his thought process.

Trigger alert: This piece contains some mention of eating disorders, abuse, and sexual violence. I read Heavy: An American Memoir by Kiese Laymon and here are my thoughts (with a couple of spoilers).

Heavy kiese